-.-

EXACTLY.
WTF
am
I
doing
online?

New
Year
is
approaching.

How
not
to
be
happy
and
neglect
all
the
other
works.

-.-

SIGH.

On the 2nd last day of 2010, I'm sigh-ing off.

:p

LALALA.

My money is at stake!

Every single action I take in life requires some sort of bribery especially money!

Perplexed.

I know this might sound crazy, cause I don't know my name.

Like Jason Derulo mentioned in his song, The only reason why we can't tell the future now is cause that's the beauty of the world we know. If we all knew about the future, no one would ever wanna live or die anymore. Moreover, we can only predict the future through our present effort and hope for the very best.

Likewise, I, sometimes, thanked God cause I can't see the future because the present already broke me and what more the future. The only unanswered question is would it be better or worst? The only thing that made me felt broken today has got nothing to with Sixth Form, the reason - human. I would like to rephrase my past.

"The day you declared him as your best friend is the day I let go of you as my best friend." 

I have come to realize this fact only now. Actually, I have already let go of her, instead I have been lying to myself about owning her as my best friend, guess that this is what happens when facts bite.The truth may be real but it hurts. I always tell myself, it must be God, it must be Him who wants to show me what life is all about. Bottom line, I am blessed with the Year 2010. The people. The resolutions made.

I am grateful for the person I am, the very positive one, somehow.

I do not know how I pulled that off but I somehow did, in my way.

And again,

WHY IS THIS ******** LIFE SO IMPORTANT TO ME?

Random: I love Toddlers! (Just like how they would love me!) :D

In the mood of "killing anyone that comes in My Way"!

So as the title goes, yeah. I am in the MOOD. My mood is forever vital to yours truly every single second. I am very ignorant about your feelings as I am to mine. The irony of me saying that my feelings are important to me and yet I ignore them is because feelings is something that affects you mentally, physically and emotionally without you being aware of its existence by itself. 

Here's the thing, the only reason why I do ignore my feelings (most of the time, NO, sometimes) yes is just cause I do not or I rather prevent myself into succumbing into my own feelings be it happy or "EMO". If you would realize or probably you would be too ignorant to this normalcy in conversations or gestures nowadays is that when people look at you and they think that you are, maybe rather down due to whatsoever they might only know after initiating a conversation at the next 5th minute with you, this is how they tend to... or you can say 'try talking to you' is by pointing their index finger towards you and rather speak enormously loud at the top of their lungs and say "YOU EMO!" or in any chatbox conversations, it would turn out to be a SHOUT OUT in Caps with multiple unending EXCLAMATION MARK!!!!!!!!!!! (Like this.) 

Bleh. Whatever. So as to my title again, I AM in the mood of "Killing Anyone That Comes In My Way!" Truth is, I'll never know when I'll throw a bombastic bomb right in your face the next time you might encounter a bump with me. (And we all know, it RARELY happens.) Hahaha. :)

Till the next time again and I was supposed to insert a picture but due to whatsoever lame excuses, I decided this will be it. THE LAME EXPRESSION.

Here's to the Breast Cancer Awareness Month to my darling females out there and not forgotten the 1 in out of 25000 guys eligible to be diagnose with breast cancer too, and yes, The Lord is fair and yeah, it's NOT COOL. 

Affirmative. I'm not doing shit today. That's what I've been constantly hammering into my head(s). 

THE END

P/S: I'm not EMO or "whatsoever" - Besides, the word EMO, wherever it originated from was never in my Vocabulary. Encore for that! ;)

Signing off in Red. ♥

KARMA will hit right back at you.

Whoever that said that, you'd better be sorry.

For I know, KARMA will hit you back real hard.

Grrr...

DAMN. Whatever.

Seriously, Whay. ♥

It has been really busy days since I don't really know when and I really do not know whether I'm exactly enjoying what I am doing now. 

Seriously, Whay. 

I hope I have all the time to sleep like how I'd used to do it whenever we have those long term holidays for ourselves especially schooling year but now I am so craving to enter school like as soon as possible or just wished that 10th of May could come faster but I too know that when that time comes, I'll be longing to come back to this break season I'm having now. So yeah. Life's cool. 

time is sucking me up...

i really really wanna update, since my birthday but...

i don't have that energy to drive me now.

stay tuned!

yours truly,

=))

don't mess with me these few days. TQ!

Phewh!

it's been three days since i've last blogged so, i thought of summarizing what happened in the three days of my work and etc. hahaha. as you know, imma employee already. beh. it almost didn't feel great but i'm glad i have something to look forward to everyday when i wake up unless i have my day off that i can get other stuffs done. 

16th January 2010.

on Saturday, i started work at 1.30pm and finishes at 10.30pm. FYI, i'm working in Padini Concept Store in AEON Bukit Tinggi. (P & Co department) working is after all not that amusing as it seems and it can be as tired like you never had sleep. hahaha. imagine 9 hours of standing everyday but you still have 1 hour break in between but that doesn't help much to sooth the sore in your legs. it's like ZOMG. but until now, i'm still hanging on in there. it's not like you will die. i'm getting used to it. haha. and i learn different things everyday. (my work ain't only about folding clothes OK!, get a life lah weh.) my break on Saturday was at 4.30pm. hell crazy! i was cracking my mind on what to eat since it's my first day at work and finally i decided on sushi from Jusco itself. it cost like RM8.88 and bought two cans of drinks which cost RM1.09 each. OMG! then on, i told myself i will have lighter meals everyday. if i were to spent that amount of money everyday, i would be broke even before i could get my salary. as crazy as it seems, i'm still enjoying! my colleagues are very nice and friendly. they are elaine, joyin, selina, kit peng and jumaria. hahaha. my main task is to take care of the wagons like when it's messy, i tidy it up. hahaha. and of course i started work on a weekend, so it was like HELL NO! stop picking those clothes, aunty! hahaha. you get fed up sometimes. and when you're in the shoes of a promoter that you will realize how they feel when you go shopping for clothes and you start pulling piece by piece from the bottom of the stack. (arghh!) and part-timers like me can leave as soon as the clock strikes at the right time, that means we do not have to care what is done and not done and just leave. like WHOOHOO man! especially when you stare at your watch and the time passes like...you can die! hahaha. you know what i mean lah. BUT AGAIN, when i think of the time passing and every cent coming in my pocket, that's a big motivation although it's not as much as Bill Gates would earn but it sure does feel good to earn your own ka-ching $$$! :D :D :D after work at 10.30pm, i meet up with Chris to catch a midnight movie! and the movie he chosed is AVATAR, the freaking 3 hours of movie. but since movie starts at 11.55am, he brought me to go makan first at some nice mamak restaurant! i ordered only roti telur because...and he was like 'you said you were hungry and that's all you ordered?' and i was like 'it's enoughlah Chris!' hahaha. anyways, he is some person that is really nice i guess, too nice that sometimes you feel scared to ask anything! hahaha. you must know him to understand this lah weh. ohya, btw, it's my first time meeting him after i got to know him. LOL. so after that, we rushed for movie. not really lah but he drove back and we walked to the cinema. SO FULL. so we waited for the movie to start and our spot is kinda nice. haha. middle row lah. as the movie go on, in my mind i was like WOW, WOWWER and WOWWEST! see how i described it. hahaha. after the movie, i was still in the WOW mode. Thank you, CHRISTOPHER KHOO TSAIR SHIEH! he has a funny name you will take years to pronounce it! LMAO. he made my first working night! haha. then of course, he fetched me home and honestly i feel so terhutang budi but really thankyousomuch!!! he planned to visit SHEILA the next day but i've got work and he has just too much work to do and btw, his feet is swollen bad due to his futsal rough crazy game. hahaha. speaking of SHEILA, i miss her so much! there is definitely an emptiness here when she's not around. that's the end of the first day of work. hahahas.

the best movie i have ever watched!

i love the Avatar of Jake Sully! Toruk Macto! :D like literally falling in love. LMAO.

17th January 2010.

my work starts at 9.30pm and i got back home at like 3.03am and slept at 4.00am! IMAGINE THAT! crazy, this is really crazy. but i could endure today more than i could expected. hahaha. at first, i went like Oh, another dreadful day! but then i survived until 6.30pm although it was really tiring. hahaha. and the customers rushed in likeWTH?! my wagons (where the clothes are stacked in the steel rack.) were all messy like mountains. this time is a shitty feeling for us promoters. hahaha. almost can die but what to do, just work.and when you see all the clothes are all tidied up and placed back, you feel Ahh! Like so nice to see the result of your work! but folding the same clothes all over and over again is ZZZ! Boring! that same piece of material i can fold it like minimum 30 times a day! and today i learned how to dust the clothes and wipe the mannequin if you work in the morning shift. hahaha. break is at 2.30pm and i didn't know what to eat so i only bought some piece of bread from Lavender. then that dreadful feeling to wait until your work ends. ZOMG! but when it has finally ended, YAY again! hahaha. this time it's 6.30pm. hahaha. luckily i skipped the big 4 hours of Peak Hours but my turn is coming up too, dies! and there is CHRIS again to fetch me and he just wanted to fetch me home cause the day before i told him i was going back by bus because my work ends before night and by 6.15pm, i got a message that says i will be waiting outside there. so now you can see how nice is this guy! like damn nice! nicer than my bro! HAHAHA. OF COURSE! on the way back, he called SHEILA and let me answered! hahaha. of course i talk to her. we can just talk any craps you know, like anything especially when we're so far away from each other and i really really wanna meet her, i hope i don't shed a tear when she comes home. then i reached my house. =) THANKS!

18th January 2010.

this is really a super-tiring day due to the day before. i have nothing to say about today cause it is just normal and the customers are moderate although they still mess up the clothes even though i'm only like 1 hour and 30 minutes away from the wagon. ZZZ! but i did learn something new today! hahaha. new stocks for Spring are in so Joyin taught me to count, mark and label the stocks! at least now i know a little secret about clothes sales. and when i say a secret, of course i don't state it here. and i know now when to get and when not to buy clothes. LMAO. that's all. my mama came to fetched me at 11.00pm. she doesn't know where to wait and the way she described her venue is like shit! and of course i got pissed and she got pissed! so whatever! now that i'm working, she has some sense to me, maybe because i'm earning money. ZZZ! i was so freaking hungry i tell you! i asked to stop by at the restaurant to pack something back and i had no money, like seriously! my dad is not back home yet lah so it's difficult for me to get my pocket money. and when i asked for some money, she was so reluctant! i was like WTF!? just send me home now! thank god for he knew i was hungry that he left one last packet of maggi mee for me. thankyou! bye.

what a new experience! 

thisain'temoorwhatsoeversostfu.

i never wanted to talk foul words to you but you made me to. you made me into someone i didn't want to, at least it only happens when you're around. i know who did what how where to me in my soon-to-be 18 years of life. you have no rights to talk this out. at all. none. i know who embraced, brought me up and believe in me throughout my life and the true fact it, you're not one of them cause you made yourself to be. this is not only sometimes, but always i wonder, do i belong here or more like where do i belong? not here i know! hahah. like yeah! i DO NOT belong here, right here at all. i gonna work myself up to there, someday, one day. i am cheating myself if i ever said you were my role model. NO. i ain't sorry about this. i just gotta pour it out to whoever. i was always patient and calm but not anymore. imma stand up for myself now. i have my own rights for myself and i ain't talking to you about it. no thanks. i am so tired. it's too much pain that i have to bear. what about him? why do you need to compare? it's not the same, totally. damn right, i wasn't a straight As scorer. but i know i have other qualities too. not you, you know nothing about me. i will say nothing now for i will proof it that day, it's coming, not so soon but i will do it! for my best! all you have done for me was, lemme think...discourage me in whatever i do, i'm so damn right about that. it's not like i wasn't contented with everything you've done for me, you just made me forgot all that, just by thinking you were damn right on your side. whatever i suppose. i am most happy and contented with what i've became over this many years, it's none of your business anyways. not you to judge what i've became also. so mind your life. thank you just the same. i just wanna say, stay out from my place. i never once asked you about it. enough of my ranting. thank you to my obedient blog. iloveyouall.